I am back!!

Hello to whoever who has the time to read this. I am back here to write again. I feel deep about writing and expressing my feelings. I believe one needs strong feelings to write about anything in their life. Naaa.... don't worry I am not crying buckets but actually I am very happy write now. These past 5 years have been really crazy for me. Huge changes and ups and downs. I have survived a storm and I want to thank everyone who has been there for me.

Through my experiences, I have learned few things about life first hand.

1) Stick in there if you are going through a rough patch of life. Don't give up. Better time will come and it will come.

2) Have high expectations from yourself and not from others. I think I am saying this because it makes you more giving than receiving(OMG I just sounded like Joey Tribbiani).

3) Happiness lies within you and you are the soul leader for your own happiness.

4) Time fly by real fast, So love your family & friends. Cherish the time you spend with them and acknowledge their efforts towards you life.

5) Listen to up beat music and you will feel better.

6) Ignore the haters. This point is very important but there are people who will try to let you down. Well guess what? Let them be. Even share love and a good vibe with them.
May be they become less bitter.

7) Be forgiving. This is a real tough one but you will never be able to live you life to the maximum until you let things go.

Alone

Another year of being single. I wonder why it scares me. I think i miss my friends and family and thats why I feel alone. Alone.... as a word sounds so aloof and lonely i wonder why it bothers everyone so much. Looking back into my life I had lots of friends back in India who had the same interest like me.
I don't want to be complaining but people here are so busy in there lives that one cannot expect that kind of time from anyone. So back to the question as to why I feel alone. May be I want a partner....yes I said maybe because the PARTNER means somebody who can accompany you and be there for you as a supporter. Well looking at people around me I don't think I can ever find one. After a broken marriage and giving trials to dating I have to accept the fact that I will be alone. That brings tears into my eyes but yes I am accepting it. All I see is people being selfish and look only for sex.
Yes I even tried things for sex but I am not into having a fuck buddy. I think I see people getting along with each other and doing things together and there is no one by my side. Also to mention that I do have lovely close friends and I am so grateful for having them in my life. but since the time I have moved in with my relatives I have been supporting myself with that I mean MONEY AND ACCOMPANY MYSELF whenever loneliness kicks in.
Recently I have started to spend a lot of time with myself and I have to admit that I am the only person in this world who would not give up on myself or just leave myself when I have no interest in myself. Yes that sounds weird but sometimes I feel that I have no interest in myself and so you can imagine how much I am interested in listening to somebody else.
And I also understand the fact that I am dealing with hypothyroid and depression. But hey at least I am writing about it. And by writing I am trying to solve this whole puzzel of why being alone bothers. Is it because we are social animals ha must be because of that fact.

How much you accept an Accent

Ok so I have bitched about people calling me dipper or FOB. Yes I am an immigrant and I thought that Vancouver is culture savvy.. Really is it? People who are born and raised here especially the same of my ethnicity are harsh. May be they just want to get away from there identity to be the same as mine, so whats going to be the easy way to make that difference....its simple make fun of a DIPPER the one just don't belong or the one who just got off the boat. And as for my fellow Canadians...they have been good so far. The one thing I have noticed that "HOW" much they understand "accents" from different countries. Just yesterday we were in class and I called out an artist name in "wrong way" or just my accent shouted out. So what I was pointing out was not noticed but what I said became the topic. I waited for them to finish of with what they have to say and then come to what I was talking about but no that just got lost in the laughter. VANCOUVER(CULTURE SAY)....HAHA!!!

Sophie Ellis Bextor - Murder On The Dancefloor HD

I found this song after years...reminds me when i was growing up and use to do the exact same dance moves in front of the T.V. I hope people like this:)

Unusual Happy Day:)

As I mentioned my wish before to do Grouse Grind...well thanks to weather that didn't happen. But my very good friend took charge and said lets go for a 10kms walk at Stanley park. I jumped to the occasion because I love to walk. It was nice sunny that day but had ice on the mountains but I am not giving up on Grouse Grind. So we planned our dinner first as what we need to do after the walk. We agreed on cooking some Indian food. At first we thought we are going to do that on her boat but the day was spontaneous. While were pacing, my friend said that "hey do you want to go for lunch with another friend?". We went at one of the expensive dock clubs. So the friend joined in and then the venue for dinner at my friends changed to the other friends house.
We cooked together. I am thankful to my prep chef and gods grace as the food turned out good. That very night made me feel so free and independent. We all had lots of fun and hope for more dinners like that...Amen:)

Pep talk:)

I have always wondered that how people help each other even when they don't know each other. My schools last day before holidays. Many students in my class planned and went out. I was so happy that we all came this far and supported each other all this while. As every one left to party or something, i stayed back as usual. I was about to leave when this lady who works as a project manager in school stopped me and started asking as how am I doing?
First of all I thank everyone who has been there for me in each day of school. I made may friends and I am happy about the fact that I have my own set of friends. So back to that sweet lady. As we started talking she said "why do I not see you smiling more often....you are young and beautiful why do I see you sad"...and our conversation went on. I told her my reasons but i wonder that the feelings I have been hiding   from my family these people who have known me for few months they can see right through me. See I don't easily share my personal situation with anyone. There were few important statements she made like "find a solution to the things that are bothering you". After few minuts she said that I will tell you one thing that when you hit the bottom, the only way is to go is top. I really thought about it for a long time and really thought that yes i have come a long way alone. In my own history I am a survivor. My present situation sucks sometimes but I so want an independent life. Anyways Talking to her helped me through the weekend and I feel better. I think i found a new friend. She is so innocent looking reserved kind of a woman who just sensed my feelings. I hope i can do something special for her in the coming days. Pep talk really helps:)

Since the time I have arrived in Canada This where I want to go. The first picture is kind of scary but I think with my well experienced friend I will be able to conquer Grouse Grind. And hope we go soon. Why am I writing this because they(I saw this show on Opera where a woman in Africa made her dreams come true by drawing in her notebook and looking at them every single day...this is inspired by her) say that if you let your word out in any way like you write your goals or draw a picture and visit that writing or piece of drawing everyday, It is believed that it will come true. This is one wish that i want it to come true as soon as possible. Since I have no interest in attending parties or get togethers but i am more interested in shaping my personality with something more meaningful(p.s I like parties with hot guys other than that not interested...just kidding).